Near death experience

"Today, ah nearly daaaaied..." Okay, maybe not "died" but I nearly got hurt. Okay, it doesn't sound dramatic anymore, but it could've been way worse than a dented desk drawer.

You see, I sit at the end of our office, under the large round clock. I love that clock. It reminds me of a good ol' fashioned train station clock - the kind that you can see from the far end of the platform. And up until 1.15 this afternoon, that clock has never shown any signs of giving in to gravity.

I know the exact time because that's when it decided to lose it grip on the wall, fall to the shelf below, smash a glass vase behind my head and bounce to the ground, taking out my desk drawers and landing 10cm from my right ankle.

The whole episode was accompanied by much crashing, smashing and other heavy noises as the timepiece made its way to the ground. Everyone in the office came rushing to the source of the noise.

I was pretty sure what was happening behind me, but as there is not much space to move, I had nowhere to go. I also realised that if I pushed my chair back to stand up, I would probably move INTO the clock's path. And so, I froze. With very wide eyes, waiting for something to hit me.

The noise stopped and the clock came to a halt at the ground by my feet. My chair was surrounded by smashed glass and broken furniture and I hadn't been touched. My colleagues cleared the mess and wheeled my chair away. I don't think I could've stood up if I tried. That massive clock almost landed on me.

Having witnessed the whole event, my manager now concedes that things do "just break" around me. He bought me a lovely giftset of a bottle of Baileys and two Baileys glasses as compensation for my near-miss.

Godverdomme.