Thursday, August 04, 2011

Warning: do not come between a girl and her ice cream

A perk in my office is that we occassionally get DVDs. Some good, some bad, but they're new and up-coming shows so it's fun to watch before the rest of the world gets to them. I receive them, cos that's my department and I I make the other minions aware that a DVD titled "Blahdittyblah" or "Working Title" has been received. We generally don't know much or anything about the shows. They're unknown entities, view at your own risk. 

So this morning, I got a short email from a colleague in the finance dept asking if they could borrow one to screen at lunch time in the boardroom as a treat for his team, it being summer and quiet season. Sure, I replied, I'll put Blahdittyblah on your desk for when you get in. He thanked me and that was the end of our correspondence. 

At 1pm, as I was just starting to tuck into my post-lunch treat, he stormed up to my desk to demand why the screening wasn't "set up". I was genuinely taken back - I didn't realise that I was supposed to be putting on the DVD and pressing play. So I duly escorted him to the boardroom, where his team were waiting in eager anticipation. 

Facing him and his team, I held the DVD like a game-show prize on display. "Dee-Vee-Dee", I started, loudly and clearly.

"Dee-Vee-Dee Ma-chine", I pointed to the appropriate device, making sure I had everyone's attention, before pressing the open/close button, placing the disk in and closing it.

"Turn on Tee-Vee", I continued in Troglodyte. With a sweeping (and some might say, sarcastic) gesture, I pressed the button like Eddie Eckstein in his prime on Telly Fun Quiz.  

"So, in summation, DVD goes in machine, TV goes on. DVD starts automatically. Here is the remote for volume." I handed the remote to the team manager. "I think you can handle it from here."

I know the patronising tone was not necessary, but if he had made it clear that he wanted or needed me to coordinate his group screening, instead of arriving and bombing on me for his lack of communication, it might have been a different situation.

Maybe... but we'll never know for sure. Because the main reason for my irritation was that he completely destroyed my ice-cream indulgence experience.

Ben'n'Jerry's can only be fully be enjoyed without disruption or distraction; it melts much too fast when subjected to rude and unnecessary interruptions. 

Consider yourselves informed for future reference: Ice-cream comes before dumbasses on my list of daily priorities. 

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