The arrogance. I think that's what it boils down to. That's what I cannot stand in a (drunk) man, who presumes that because he is male, and I am female, I should want to engage in conversation - or more - with him.
We were leaving work on Friday afternoon. It had been a nice day of training, I was walking to the tram stop with two of my new colleagues - admittedly, two young, very good looking ladies. I can understand why a drunk imbecile would decide that he should talk to these three woman, because he is a drunk imbecile, basically.
So he broke up our conversation to throw himself in the middle of our circle and started telling us how pretty we were. We smiled and turned our backs on him. He repositioned himself in the middle of the circle, breathing his drunk fumes in our faces. Persuasive argument, but we still - oddly enough - weren't interested.
"Nay, dank u," I said sweetly (patronisingly) and waved gently in his face, "Totziens."
Time to fuck off, dude.
My passive-aggressive actions pissed him off. He got on the tram with us and sat down next to me. I moved, trying to ignore him, hoping he'd get bored. He moved with me. I tried harder to ignore him - he was now muttering in my ear about how rude I was for dismissing him like that. We eventually managed to pretend he wasn't there and he lost interest. He turned his attentions to patting another guy on the head.
It was a stupid little incident. God knows where he had been, to be that wasted at 5pm. But it really pissed me off. It was all I could do, to not send a swift elbow into his solar plexus. He wasn't violently threatening us, he was just being annoying. But it's the arrogance of the whole incident. The arrogance, aided by alcohol, that we should be flattered because he told us we were pretty.
I mean surely, we should've been swooning at his feet?
It's this attitude that makes me want to react violently. His leering at us, albeit drunken, speaks of a certain mindset. Well, it made me think of a certain mindset. The arrogance that he can presume to interrupt our conversation, because our entire day had been a prelude for this interaction with The Male Speciman.
Actually, I don't really know where I'm going with this... but it made me want to shove him in front of the approaching tram. Most guys don't realise how threatening they can inadvertantly be. It was three girls and one drunk guy - and he was still able to threaten us by his body language.
It was only after The Speciman got off the tram, that all three of us visibly relaxed. By that stage, he wasn't even paying us attention anymore, but we were all consciously NOT making eye-contact with him. We were being submissive by not being aggressive. Maybe I get angry for letting myself feel threatened?
Or is it because I want to remove the threat before it becomes a reality? Even when drunk, and although his reactions might be slow, a man will be stronger than me. It's a fact. Maybe it's a survival instinct that gives me (us?) that adrenaline rush in such an seemingly innocuous situation? Maybe it's my heightened awareness from growing up in SA?
All I know for sure is that I hope The Speciman feels very, very shit when he wakes up from his drunken stupour. Because up until being forced to breathe his exhaled fumes, my day had been lovely. Training is going really well and I think that this position might be something that I can get stuck into... even if they won't let me online during work hours.
ps. Remember the Organ Donor furore going on in Holland? The show was on last night - and guess what... it was a hoax to raise awareness. I'm amazed that no one let it leak, which would also explain why the publicity for the show and the show itself happened within the same week. Two thumbs way up to them.